ASYLUM (1972)

Okay, confession time: this one actually made me stay up all night. It's probably because I started watching it at midnight this past Saturday, and I'm easier to scare after 12 o'clock. But MAN, this got to me for some stupid reason.

This is one of those many, many Amicus anthology pictures that I've already mentioned (TALES FROM THE CRYPT, THE HOUSE THAT DRIPPED BLOOD), and while the *stories* aren't the best in this one, the *framing story* is. The setup is this: Dr. Martin is sent to an asylum for the incurably insane to interview for a job. One of the inmates is the former head doctor of the institute, Dr. Starr. But Dr. Starr has taken on another identity, and Dr. Martin has to guess which one of the inmates he is by interviewing each of them, accompanied by the attendant Max Reynolds. There's really only 3 stories in this: the first one is about a voodoo-practicing wife that gets murdered and takes her revenge from beyond the grave!!! The second is about a tailor who is hired (by Peter Cushing!) to make a strange suit out of a material that can bring things to life, but it winds up accidentally on his store's mannequin for a bit too long. This is probably the best story in the whole thing. The third is some lame split personality (or is it?) BS. The final one isn't really a story -- it's just a link back to the framing story, and is about a guy who makes tiny, anatomically correct (down to the organs!) dolls. He brings one that's supposed to be him to life, and it stabs the current head doctor of the asylum, and all hell breaks loose. In the end, we find out who the real Dr. Starr is, and there's this extended laugh that he does that goes on for FOREVER. And let me tell you, that laugh SCARED ME HALF TO DEATH. It's the craziest thing. Monsters, slashers, whatever...I can handle 'em. But this guy laughing just jangled all my nerves. Crazy.

So then I was up all night.

That's my story. Anyway, ASYLUM is great. It's a whole lot of fun, even if it's not the best Amicus anthology, but from what I've seen, you can't go wrong with any of them. Some are more hit than miss, but they're always goofy and lively.

TALES FROM THE CRYPT (1972)

All right! Another one of those Amicus anthology pictures. This one is all based on stories from horror comics in the 1950s (geeky note: only two of the stories are from Tales From the Crypt! The others are from The Haunt of Fear and The Vault of Horror, but they all came out at the same time by the same people, so it’s kind of like splitting hairs.). I’ve got a few of the reprints of the comics, and they’re all GREAT. This movie isn’t as much fun as the comics themselves, mostly because just about everyone’s very British and very stiff-upper-lipped, and the artwork in the comics is a lot more ghoulish but it’s still pretty fun on its own. There’s a Christmas story about a deranged madman dressed like Santa. There’s one about a guy who has a car wreck with his mistress and things only get worse. One’s about a poor, kindly old guy (Peter Cushing!) who entertains the neighborhood kids and gets pushed into killing himself (this one is really sad!!!). One is about a monkey’s paw that grants wishes, but the wishes all turn out in the worst way possible. And the last one is about a horrible old jerk who takes over a home for the blind and treats everyone like crap. In the end, they get their revenge, and it makes me squirm just to think about it. This is one of the best of these anthology movies, but if you really want something fun, check out the comics. They’re AMAZING!

THE HOUSE THAT DRIPPED BLOOD (1971)

This kind of movie is great – it’s like a bunch of little stories all linked together. This one studio in England, Amicus Pictures, made a bunch of them, and this is probably the best one. The linking element is that everyone who’s lived in this particular house has had something horrible happen to them. (The weird thing, though, is that even though there’s been all these owners, all the stories look like they take place during the same week in 1971!) There’s witchcraft and voodoo dolls, a writer’s horror story coming to life, a creepy wax museum, and a cursed vampire cape. There’s Christopher Lee, Peter Cushing, Ingrid Pitt and Jon Pertwee (who played the fourth Doctor in DOCTOR WHO!). It’s all pretty much tongue-in-cheek and everybody seems to be having a lot of fun. You will too if you watch it!